Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts
Stacy Lee

Transformation


Unless the LORD builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the LORD guards the city,
The watchman stays awake in vain.
~Psalm 127:1

The process of Transformation is not an easy process. It seems as though God tears us down only to rebuild us brick by brick. I've been in the process of learning to let go of my circumstances and allowing God to transform me by them and in the midst of Him. One thing remains the same: I can trust Him to be faithful.

As God rebuilds me and my life, I can start to see light breaking through on the horizon. I can see Him through the joy, the pain, the tears and the dark. I can begin to rest and join Him on this journey as He orders my steps and rebuilds my walls that were once torn down. I can learn to let go and trust Him to strategically rearrange my circumstances for me and my transformation and never against me.

I look back and see the self-condemnation combined with the distrust that I have often felt during this time. I realize now how Satanic it all is. I realize now that God is the Master Author and Master Planner. Surely He can and has done a work--not just in my life, but in yours as well--that only He could be in control of. I realize how powerful and strong His wisdom is. I realize how it all weaves together into a flow in His perfect timing and I look back and I'm not who I used to be. I'm so much better. Surely, the more I become like Christ the more alive I become. Surely by saying NO to sin and YES to God I become more and more alive and death looses his angry grip on me.

Thank you God for being the Author of our lives and of our faith. Just like the picture above shows He orders our steps and our circumstances to transform us into someone more alive--someone more like Jesus. With each step death has to surrender as more life is poured into us.

Thank you God for the painful process of Transformation. Thank you for teaching me and the others here to wait for You, watch for You, bless You and perhaps most importantly trust You on this journey. Thank you God for molding and shaping our faith in a way that pleases You and makes us more alive in You. Thank you God for it all. Even when it's painful, there is so much Grace. Thank you God for the Grace. Thank you for You.
In Jesus Name, Amen.



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Stacy Lee

Memory

They shall utter the memory of Your great goodness, And shall sing of Your righteousness.
~Psalm 145:7

Ever feel like this? (I have!) Looking back over our pasts can be excruciatingly painful if we don't let God radically transform our trials and wounds for His Glory. We have to be willing to let go of those memories and allow the healing power of God to come in and restore those areas of our lives. That is what this artwork is all about. It is about allowing God to restore our memory and align our history up with His truth.

Here is the thing (and I know this from first hand experience), Satan attacks us through our wounds and memories. If we let our memory and wounds remain in the dark, we will continue to live in unhealthy cycles of pain. Once we allow our history to be exposed to the light of Christ, He removes the lies and the darkness of the enemy and sets us free to walk in truth.

I pray that as you are reading this blog and looking at this artwork, that God would do a mighty work in you. I pray He would reveal to you the memories and wounds He wants to heal you from and expose all the lies you have agreed with the enemy on. I pray in the Name of Jesus that He would break those agreements you've made with the enemy and set you free forever with His Truth. May His Truth be planted in your hearts and take root in a mighty and powerful way--so much so that many others will also be brought to the Truth of Christ as a result of the fruit that springs forth from the seeds of Truth that Jesus has planted in you. In Jesus Name I pray this, Amen.

On a side note, please forgive my absence. I am in the middle of a major season of transition because God has opened up a new door in my life. It is an exciting but crazy time and I'd appreciate your prayers as I await God's provision. I am now on a church planting team and will be putting a lot of time and effort into building His church. Praise Him!

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Stacy Lee

The Goodness of the Lord

Do not let it be known that the woman came to the threshing floor. ~Ruth 3:14

The threshing floor is where the heads of grain would be broken from the stalks. This was done with either oxen trampling the stalks or by a threshing sledge. You can imagine that this can be a rather painful experience if we put ourselves into the shoes of the wheat. Yet, I believe God puts us through this process to refine us, mold us and transform us into His image for His Glory (Isaiah 28:23-29). Ruth certainly experienced this after her devastating losses (death of her husband, brother in law, father in law and leaving her homeland). However, I believe the LORD is saying in the above scripture (in symbolic terms) that He is going to exalt her so high, that no one would ever even know of her threshing floor experience, unless they were told of the very humbling circumstances that God allowed into Ruth’s life to prepare her for His Glory. This of course came to past as she is the great grandmother of King David and eventually of Jesus Himself. Yes, it is true that God does indeed exalt the humble (James 4:6) She started on the threshing floor, and God put her on a high place!

You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.
“Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name." -Psalm 91:13-14

My hope and prayer is that this will encourage you today. I know this Word has encouraged me. I don't know about you--but I'm ready for the harvest! It's been a long time coming ;)

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Stacy Lee

Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed earnestly that it would not rain; and it did not rain on the land for three years and six months. And he prayed again, and the heaven gave rain, and the earth produced its fruit. James 5:17-18

It is a privilege and a pleasure to wait on the Lord. He alone can satisfy our deepest desires and needs. I think life is oftentimes a journey to learn how to wait and prepare. We have to surrender our clocks and our time over to the Lord and let Him decide what is the best timing for all things and seasons in our lives. He alone knows all things so it is best just to seek His wisdom and trust Him with every season He does or doesn't bring into our lives. His ways are higher than ours, and it is best if we surrender to His sovereignty sooner rather than later.

I think God answered Elijah's prayer because he was willing to wait for the Lord. He knew what God wanted, prayed for Him to do it, trusted Him to do it and then waited for Him to do it. His whole life and time table was surrendered to God's hands.

Is there an area in your life that you will not sacrifice your time for? Have you been unwilling to give God your watch? If we are to be fully surrendered to our Master, we must obey His clock and not our own. This is part of the process of denying ourselves and our own imperfect wisdom by surrendering to His Master plan. God always knows best. Are you willing to surrender your time to Him today?

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Stacy Lee

Remain in My Love


Jesus said, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.”
~John 15:9

Every so often, God brings up situations and circumstances in our lives that hit on old wounds--usually childhood ones. God brings these wounds up because He wants to heal us from them so we can have life more abundantly and be more like Christ. Our wounds block us from enjoying fellowship with God and with each other. If you are struggling with this today, I'd encourage you to let God heal your hurts. Let Him take His time--He knows exactly what He is doing. There is a time and a season for all things under the sun. There is a time to heal and a time to grow out of our pain. It is important to remember that God redeems our past by actually changing it. I believe God can rewrite our history. He brings up old wounds, heals them, and then shows us how mightily we were loved all along the way in places where we only saw pain and darkness before. God wastes nothing--not even time.

I've also learned that a part of discipleship is wounding. God allows us to be wounded so we can be more like Christ and molded and shaped into His image as God heals us. Knowing God as Healer is a wonderful and intimate thing! As crazy as it sounds, enjoy this time. Enjoy the time of solitude and intimacy with God as He heals your heart. Knowing Him intimately in this way will carry your heart through the rest of your journey and time here on earth.

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Stacy Lee
"I do not receive honor from men." ~John 5:41

Lately, the Lord keeps showing me this passage. I've been working so hard lately, and it's tempting to feel like a machine when you are not being rewarded for your efforts (at least in the immediate time). God has reminded me that the great I AM lives inside of me. At first when I saw this passage, I was tempted to think perhaps I was not honoring God in an area of my life. Don't you love how Satan accuses us when we are in intimate fellowship with the Lord? God corrected me and told me that the I AM that is inside of me does not receive honor for the work I've been doing by humans. Then the light bulb went off! As Christians, because God "I AM" lives inside of us, when someone does not honor us, they are dishonoring God. In other words, when someone causes us pain, they cause God pain. They are marring the image of God and the Holy Spirit that is inside of us. It reminds me of this verse:

"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'" ~Matthew 25:40

Now I understand what this passage means! To take it one step further, I was recently able to help a married couple who are good friends of mine by letting them stay at my place which was very close to the hospital. The wife was in labor expecting her first and they lived 25 minutes away. We didn't get much sleep that night, but during the part that I did, the Lord woke me up and said, "You are my blessing." It dawned one me later that He was saying, "I am in labor and you helped me by letting me stay in your home by the hospital. You are my blessing." I hope this helps you to understand why it is so important to honor God by honoring others. When we dishonor other people we are really dishonoring the Lord!

On another note... I want to show this series together:

He calls me Beloved

He calls me Friend

May the Lord bless and keep you!

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Stacy Lee


Save the Gulf

I imagine earth joins me in crying out to God:
From the end of the earth I will cry to You,
When my heart is overwhelmed;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
~Psalm 61:2



I don't live near the gulf, but I've been horrified by what I've seen on the news. This is my attempt at doing something about it. I've prayed and will continue to pray. This artwork is in response to prayer. 50% of the profits off this artwork will go to www.ibrrc.org who are down in the gulf now rescuing oiled wildlife. Unfortunately, the wildlife are the innocent victims of human greed.

I'm very concerned about the people in the gulf. I pray that God will have mercy and shield them from the toxins. I also pray that the oil can be contained as much as possible to keep from spreading. My heart goes to those who lost loved ones in this disaster and for those who will be out of food and out of work for an indefinite amount of time.

No doubt that earth is groaning and moaning and waiting for her King (Romans 8:22).

May God help us all and have mercy on us! Lord, please, have mercy!

LORD, I have heard of your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, O LORD. Renew them in our day, in our time make them known; in wrath remember mercy. ~Habakkuk 3:2

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. ~2 Chronicles 7:14

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Stacy Lee

Refined As Gold

“Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver;
I have tested you in the furnace of affliction.”
~Isaiah 48:10

“I will bring the one-third through the fire,
Will refine them as silver is refined,
And test them as gold is tested.
They will call on My name,
And I will answer them.
I will say, ‘This is My people’;
And each one will say, ‘The LORD is my God.’”
~Zechariah 13:9

He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver. Then the LORD will have men who will bring offerings in righteousness.
~Malachi 3:3

God allows certain trials and tribulations in our lives so we can refined for His Glory. The more He cuts away, molds, and shapes us, the more we become like Christ. I've learned that God wants me to have a Holy attitude when tribulations come. Will I trust Him and lean on faith that He is using this for my good? Or will I have another meltdown?

One of the biggest way God uses circumstances in my life to refine me is in seasons of waiting. Especially when I'm waiting for deliverance. Am I going to complain or trust His timing? Am I going to be patient and believe God knows what He is doing or freak out?

I've found that for each level of blessing comes new levels of challenges and trials. I'm willing to bet that what God is using to refine you now is the very thing that is going to build up your faith so you are ready for the next major work He is going to do in your life. Let us not grow weary in persevering in the refining fires, but let us look at it as a major season of preparation for what is ahead. God knows what is before us, and He knows the end that He wants to bring us to. He also knows what we need to endure now before we get there to that end. He is a good God-- let's remember that, too.


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Stacy Lee

Had I Not Believed

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the LORD
In the land of the living.
~Psalm 27:13

I was having a rough day-- spiritually-- when I was creating this. I decided to get it all out in the artwork. The Lord honored my requested and this came out. It's confirmation in a way. I think some times we get so on edge about different circumstances in our lives that we can start to feel we are off track. After this was created, I knew I wasn't off the mark but right on it instead. What peace came over me to know I'm where He wants me to be. It's a waiting game most of the time (it seems) but this valley, too, shall pass until the Lord gives me clarity on the next great thing He has up His sleeve.

Ultimately, I’m amazed that God still moves through me even in times I don’t feel at all on the mark. Maybe I’m closer than I appear to be. Maybe you also feel the same?

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Stacy Lee
The past several years of my life have been... interesting. At least, that's the most positive way I can put it. I'm amazed at how God has transformed me through the devastation and the pain. I suppose the biggest thing I've learned is how God has His hand in *everything.* The steps of the righteous ARE ordered by the Lord. I know now that He is in fact the author and the finisher of our faith. God has been building up a solid rock of faith in my life during the last few years. Perhaps He has done the same with you. I learned that faith is not built on the mountaintop of Glory but in the valley of destruction. God is a hurricane. A loving one. Fierce--but loving.

So with a new decade upon us, I leave us with two images (perhaps the last 2 that will be created this year-- depending on how my week goes). I know for me, the first one represents the last few years of my life and the second one represents what is to come in His perfect timing. I pray the Lord will speak to you through these images-- wherever you are in your walk with Him.

Double for all Her Sins

Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the LORD’s hand
double for all her sins.
~Isaiah 40:2


Pursued by Glory

And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the LORD your God. ~Deuteronomy 28:2


All the GLORY goes to God. May He get the glory out of our lives in 2010! Amen.

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Stacy Lee

Rise Above

Then the LORD said to Moses, “Come up to Me on the mountain and be there.” ~Exodus 24:12a

From the end of the earth I will cry to You,
When my heart is overwhelmed;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. ~Psalm 61:2

You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands;
You have put all things under his feet. ~Psalm 8:6

There comes a time in your life when God will call you up higher on the mountain to be alone with Him. You don't pick the time-- God does. He orders your steps. He orders your circumstances. Like the Psalmist says, "When my heart is overwhelmed; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I" (Psalm 61:2). When life becomes crushing and unbearable. When faith is the only thing you have left. When people (family, friends) turn their back on you. When the ones you helped have all walked out. When tragedy or trauma hits. When stress and pressure builds up and you become like a bomb just waiting to explode. It's time. It's time to go up higher on the mountain with the Lord.

During a season in my life when God called me up higher on the mountain, He revealed something important to me. My life circumstances were crushing, but what He told me on the mountain was soothing. He showed me Psalm 8:6. He reminded me there that He has put all things under our feet. He said to me, "Rise above." Then I got it! The higher up on the mountain we go with God the more things He puts under our feet. The closer I draw to my Lord the more I identify with HIM and the less I identify with my crushing circumstances. The more I see Jesus and focus on Him the more I rest in faith and not doubt, fear, worry, or despair.

Is He leading you to the Rock? Is He calling you up higher? Go to Him. Go higher. Draw near to the Lord. Let Him lift you up and put all these crushing things under your feet. The higher you go up on the mountain with the Lord the farther below your circumstances will go under you until they vanish and you can only focus on the One who called you. Peace.

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Stacy Lee

Restore the Desolate Years

I want to encourage you. It doesn't matter what you've done, what others have done to you, or what the enemy has thrown you into. God can restore your desolate years. This scripture has comforted me so much:

So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten,
The crawling locust,
The consuming locust,
And the chewing locust,
My great army which I sent among you.

You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied,
And praise the name of the LORD your God,
Who has dealt wondrously with you;
And My people shall never be put to shame.

Then you shall know that I am in the midst of Israel:
I am the LORD your God
And there is no other.
My people shall never be put to shame. “
~Joel 2:25-27

Do you believe it? We may be a dead tree but all God has to do is breathe life into us and a new branch is born. Jesus is the resurrection and the life (John 11:25)-- He can resurrect anything! What I love about God is He will take the mistakes that we've made and use them later down the road for purpose that brings Him Glory and does us much good in the end.

Do not fear your past. He is the God of the second chance! All things work toward the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). Be at peace, and let God work. If you let Him, He will restore your desolate and wasted years. He loves you.

Let us pray.

Father, comfort your children with these words. Lift them up and hold them close unto You. Let them remember Your faithfulness and Your promises. Redemption, O God, is only found in You, and we ask You to redeem us now and restore our wasted and desolate years. Have mercy on us Lord, and we thank You for Your lovingkindness. Help us to be a vessel for Your use so we may show the same mercy and lovingkindness You have shown us to others for Your Glory. We praise Lord, and we love You. We worship only You.

In Jesus Name,
Amen

Stacy Lee

Mourning into Dancing

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness,
To the end that my glory may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever.
~Psalm 30:11-12

The earth was without form, and void; and darkness was on the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.
Then God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light.
~Genesis 1:2-3

I love how God can turn the bleakest, darkest, most miserable places into a place of dancing and rejoicing! That's what this artwork is all about.

In the beginning, there was darkness, and all God had to do was say, "Let there be light." And there was light! Do you know that God can breathe life into anything? Do you know that He can resurrect anything? Your relationships, your health, your financial situation, etc. Like the above Genesis scripture tells us, light came out of a dark place. All God had to do was speak. God can certainly speak over our desolate situations today and breathe them back to life!

We have to look within during the dark times. Greater is He who is in you! The same power that conquered the grave lives inside of us! Look for the well of water that is never empty inside of Jesus. He will sustain you until God speaks light over your circumstances.

I didn't realize that the process of building solid faith is done in a very dark, depressing, discouraging, and despairing place. But then again, I don't know anyone who gained their faith basking in Glory on the mountain top. It's in the dark valley where we are called to step out on faith and believe God's promises and believe He is good despite how bad our situation might be. That is a place where faith is built! Surely, no one gets there without a struggle and a fight! In fact, some of you may be in the battle for your life right now. Times like that require great faith to pray, "Thy Will be done." It's easy to pray, "Lord, have Your way!" when everything in your life is going good. But when everything you touch crumbles to pieces, when everything is falling apart and nothing comes together, when all hell has broken loose around you, it's a different story-- a faith story to pray, "Thy Will be done!"

Out of the darkest times of my life, I look back and see how God built a solid foundation of faith in me. I may have been backed up into a corner and surrounded by chaos in a pit that kept getting deeper, but God was using it all to make a prayer warrior out of me. He will equip you for your calling in a tough place. Know that you cannot do what God has called you to do, no matter what it is, without great faith. But once we go through what we have to go through to build our faith, God will show us how He has been there all along anxiously waiting to turn our mourning into dancing. God won't bless us with our calling or next stage in life until we are ready for it. We'll stay in the valley as long as it takes to build up the necessary faith. But once we are ready, God will swiftly bring us out of the dark as He speaks light over our lives. Glory be to God!
Stacy Lee

Light My Way

Rejection: God’s Way of Shutting a Door


Jesus rejected at Nazareth: All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him down the cliff. But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way. ~Luke 4:28-30 NIV

“And if any place will not welcome you or listen to you, shake the dust off your feet when you leave, as a testimony against them.” ~Mark 6:11 NIV


I was going to write on a new piece, but God led me to write on the topic of rejection. This image “Light My Way,” although older, is more appropriate for this issue because I believe God does order our steps through rejection.


Rejection is one of the hardest things we humans have to deal with. One of the definitions of the word “reject” is to spit out or vomit. Being rejected can literally leave a bad taste in your mouth. Jesus knew what this meant. He was rejected by His own people in Nazareth. According to the above passage in Luke, they literally drove Him out of town. But what I love about this scripture is the last sentence: “But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.” He simply went on His way. He didn’t stand in front of a shut door—He moved!


We have to know when to move. We have to know when God is calling us to move. The steps of the righteous person are ordered by the Lord, and God will use rejection as a sign for us to move on (Psalm 37:23). Jesus does not dwell on the rejection or feed off of it into anger or depression. He simply “went on his way.”


Jesus also tells us if we are not received or heard then we should shake the dust off our feet as we move on (Mark 6:11). The word for “receive” in the NKJV or “welcome” in the NIV is from the Greek word dexomai meaning “to receive hospitably, entertain.” In other words, if you are not treated in a hospitable manner by those you have come to minister too or serve with, then it may be time to shake off the dust and move on.


I like the idea here of shaking off the dust. It’s almost like saying, “I’m not going to let this bother me or get to me. This isn’t about me, they are rejecting the God I serve and the ministry He has called me into.” In New Testament times, the disciples would shake the dust off their feet as a way of showing separation from the Jews who had rejected their Messiah. It was a way of saying they made the wrong decision.


What about being rejected by other believers? One of the hardest things we have to deal with is being rejected by fellow believers. We can’t take offense when this happens; we have to trust that God has something far greater for us elsewhere. If we feel we are being hindered and cannot serve in the capacity the Lord has called us to serve because of rejection, then don’t mull over it—move on. Don’t stand in front of a shut door crying. Move on! Jesus was rejected by His own people, and He simply went on His way.


God can use a trap set out by the enemy who led you into rejection and make it into a stepping stone. There is purpose in everything—yes, even in rejection! Rejoice in the Lord for simply lighting your way. It may have hurt for a time, but God has something greater for you. You have to trust and believe that there is a new day coming of getting back up. There will come a day when you can serve the Lord in full capacity in a place were you are received hospitably and able to do all that God has sent you to do. Then, you can truly dance on rejection! Satan may have meant it to stop you and hurt you, but God will always use it for your good. Glory be to God! Amen.



Stacy Lee

Many are the Afflictions


Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the LORD delivers him out of them all.
~Psalm 34:19

For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory. ~2 Cor. 4:17

Everything we go through is with purpose. Some pits we get ourselves into and others God throws us into. Just look at the life of Joseph (Start Genesis 37). We have to trust God in these moments of blindness that He has a plan with good intentions for us (Jeremiah 29:11). In these times of afflictions, faith is built, and we are made stronger.

I didn't understand that if I wanted to get strong and be a warrior in God's Kingdom, then I would have to suffer through many things. I have found that oftentimes, at our weakest point, God will kick us while we are down through an affliction, but only to build us up stronger. He will use the affliction to make us strong. The hardest times in my life have been the most forming times. I can easily look back and see God forming my clay vessel with His hands and breaking off the bad branches that didn't bear fruit, but restoring the wound and allowing it to heal into a healthy branch that can be used for His purposes.

God has to break our will first before He can truly use us. We are of no use to God if we constantly assert our own will over His. We have to learn to go when God says, "Go" without questioning Him. We have to learn to wait when God says,"Wait" without questioning Him. It is through these afflictions that work for us we learn to trust God completely, build up strong faith in Him, and grow stronger in the process.

After suffering through many trials, I've noticed how fearless I've become. Things that use to phase me don't bother me anymore. I can handle this because my God has brought me through and out of the darkest of pits! No one conquers fear without going into the battle and finishing the fight. These are the things that warriors are made of.

Let God work through the process you need to go through in whatever affliction you are dealing with now. Let Him has His way with you. Sometimes you have to go through what you go through. Through this you will learn to trust Him and hold on to Him for dear life. He will get you out in His perfect time. It may take a day, or it may take ten years. But our God is a faithful God, and He will always bring you out.

We don't jump from mountain top to mountain top, but we have to go through the valley of the shadow of death before we can reach the next mountain top. You will find that God is there in the midst of it all carrying you all the times you could not even walk yourself. Glory be to God!

I leave you with this scripture that comforted me during times of affliction:

But godliness with contentment is great gain.
~1 Timothy 6:6

Let's learn to be content in being Godly and obedient to the Lord and let God handle the rest.


Stacy Lee

A Father's Promise


O LORD God, do not reject your anointed one.
Remember the great love promised to David your servant.
~2 Chronicles 6:42

This is a very personal piece for me. I had a vague idea what I wanted to portray when I started, but God moved very powerfully in this piece. This woman has come from the mountain top of the Lord and walked through the dry and barren desert to get to her Heavenly Father's promise. It has been a long, hard and very painful journey, but she knows that her God never fails. Along the way God has whispered ever so delicately in her ear "the purpose is greater than the pain."

Sometimes it is so hard believe that God truly loves us when everything in life seems to be working against us. God will back us up into a corner and ask, "Do I favor you?" The answer has to be "yes," because God would not take the time to plan out one tragedy after the next in our lives. (I'm sure some of you all reading this can really testify...) It almost gets to the point where it is easier for God to bless than to strike out against us, but He chooses the latter.

Along the way I've realized that I have to pay the price for my anointing. Jesus, Joseph, David, Paul, Jacob, Esther, etc. all paid the price for theirs. Why would I be any different? The greater the anointing-- the greater test. I've realized in the midst of many tragedies that God does favor me-- despite what my life circumstances say. Only until God has taken every good thing out of Job's life does he say, "I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees You" (Job 42:5). When God goes out of His way to take the good out of your life-- to the point where it gets almost comical (you start to laugh because you can't cry anymore), then your eyes have seen God. Then you know Him. You know it doesn't depend on you, and it's not up to you. It's up to Him. The time will come when He will bless, but in the mean time all you can do is believe-- the purpose is far greater than the pain.

God will keep His promises, and they will all come to past in His perfect timing. He is a faithful God who never fails. Be at peace during this time of trial even though it has been long and there may be longer still to go. There is a glory coming for you after this if you remain faithful to His plan for your life. When it's your time to be blessed-- then it's your time, and the devil can't stop! We will reach the lush forest of promise in due time if we do not lose heart.

Remember David's words before He became King:

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the LORD
In the land of the living.
~Psalm 27:13